Ok People,
I just have one thing to say R.O.U.S's. They exist. I'm just assuming that you have all seen "The Princess Bride" because it is totally a classic. But, if you haven't, "R.O.U.S." stands for "Rodents Of Unusual Size"
Yesterday Dad started yelling from outside the house telling us to come look at the huge rat the dogs just killed. I didn't really want to get up from the computer to go and see it as the dogs kill big rats all of the time. When everybody started freaking out I decided to go look...
It was HU MUNG US. The biggest rat I have ever seen in my life. I immediately thought, "Ooh, I should take a picture of that for my blog." But... I'm sort of a procrastinator so...
later that day, I asked Dad what he did with it and he said he had double wrapped it in plastic bags and thrown it away. Benjamin offerred to get it out with me so I could take a picture for you guys. But we had been working on plumbing and I am sort of a procrastinator so...
Well, I woke up this morning and was all like, "Heeeey Benj, let's go take a picture of that rat." He was not buying it. He told me that that offer had expired due to the length of time since the rat had ceased to live. He had a point but I couldn't just let it go. I mean, you guys deserve to see this thing. Because, If I tell you it was "Thissssss BIIIIIIIIIIIG" You wouldn't believe me anyways.
I was making some muffins and I determined that as soon as I put the first batch in, I was going to go for it. I am used to stink. I live in a land that produces some of the most horrifying smells you can imagine. Huge dead rat can't be that bad... right?
I got the camera and marched out to the trash can and opened the lid. There was the bag sitting there all by itself. Unmistakable. I pulled it out of the bin. I could see flies and other UFO's buzzing around inside the bag. I'm beginning to think this isn't such a good idea. I gulped for breath and started to untie the first knot. (Dad always double knots trash) The stench that was unleashed with the untying of that first knot was overwhelming and unbearable. I jumped away from it trying to breath... Why am I doing this??? Remember the blog Margaret... do it for the blog. Another huge gulp of air and I go in for the second knot. Finally releasing the full stench of the dead rat. I dumped it in the ground, and ran up to the porch to get one of Benjamin's size 12-13 Flip Flops for size reference. I thought I was safe to breathe a few yards away. I was wrong. The smell was enveloping the whole yard. I ran back and snapped the two pictures.
Ok, Margaret, the hard part is over now. You just have to get it back in the fly infested bag and throw it away again. No big deal. Wait, did I mention that there was dog poop on the bag too? Nevermind...
Using the clean outside part of the bag to shield my hand I tried to pick it up. Riga mortis should have set in right? Wrong. It felt like it was filled with water. It was squishing around like one of those weird water snake thingys we all used to play with. I used to LOVE those things. Despite having a plastic bag between you and the actual fur of the dead rat in question, it is not fun to play with a stinky, dead, furry rodent-water snake.
Eventually I got it in the bag. And I cast it back into the filthy chasm from whence it came.
*Warning there are disturbing images ahead*
I just have one thing to say R.O.U.S's. They exist. I'm just assuming that you have all seen "The Princess Bride" because it is totally a classic. But, if you haven't, "R.O.U.S." stands for "Rodents Of Unusual Size"
Yesterday Dad started yelling from outside the house telling us to come look at the huge rat the dogs just killed. I didn't really want to get up from the computer to go and see it as the dogs kill big rats all of the time. When everybody started freaking out I decided to go look...It was HU MUNG US. The biggest rat I have ever seen in my life. I immediately thought, "Ooh, I should take a picture of that for my blog." But... I'm sort of a procrastinator so...
later that day, I asked Dad what he did with it and he said he had double wrapped it in plastic bags and thrown it away. Benjamin offerred to get it out with me so I could take a picture for you guys. But we had been working on plumbing and I am sort of a procrastinator so...
Well, I woke up this morning and was all like, "Heeeey Benj, let's go take a picture of that rat." He was not buying it. He told me that that offer had expired due to the length of time since the rat had ceased to live. He had a point but I couldn't just let it go. I mean, you guys deserve to see this thing. Because, If I tell you it was "Thissssss BIIIIIIIIIIIG" You wouldn't believe me anyways.
I was making some muffins and I determined that as soon as I put the first batch in, I was going to go for it. I am used to stink. I live in a land that produces some of the most horrifying smells you can imagine. Huge dead rat can't be that bad... right?
I got the camera and marched out to the trash can and opened the lid. There was the bag sitting there all by itself. Unmistakable. I pulled it out of the bin. I could see flies and other UFO's buzzing around inside the bag. I'm beginning to think this isn't such a good idea. I gulped for breath and started to untie the first knot. (Dad always double knots trash) The stench that was unleashed with the untying of that first knot was overwhelming and unbearable. I jumped away from it trying to breath... Why am I doing this??? Remember the blog Margaret... do it for the blog. Another huge gulp of air and I go in for the second knot. Finally releasing the full stench of the dead rat. I dumped it in the ground, and ran up to the porch to get one of Benjamin's size 12-13 Flip Flops for size reference. I thought I was safe to breathe a few yards away. I was wrong. The smell was enveloping the whole yard. I ran back and snapped the two pictures.
Ok, Margaret, the hard part is over now. You just have to get it back in the fly infested bag and throw it away again. No big deal. Wait, did I mention that there was dog poop on the bag too? Nevermind...
Eventually I got it in the bag. And I cast it back into the filthy chasm from whence it came.
*Warning there are disturbing images ahead*
That is Benjamin's Men Size 12-13 flip flop. Yeah.
So, other than the dogs killing the R.O.U.S., my day yesterday involved assisting some kind of surgical procedure (involving extracting clear liquid from an infection) on a dog, assisting in the installation of a new water pump, and assisting in the laying of a few hundred feet of PVC pipe.
What did you do? :)
Marg
